Heartwarming: While Rest of America Remains Divided, Local Lakes Harmoniously Come Together

 

Terrebonne Parish, LA – While the rest of the country remains embroiled in vicious cultural and political struggles, the lakes of South Louisiana have harmoniously been coming together. This heartwarming display of love has redefined our coast, teaching many residents about the grand accomplishments that can be achieved with the power of solidarity.

Once separated by miles of thick, impenetrable marsh grass, these lakes have merged into a singular expanse of open water that now fades nebulously into the Gulf of Mexico. It seems nothing can keep these love-struck lakes apart! They are showing residents of Terrebonne and Lafourche Parish that the power of love and unity can overcome even the harshest boundaries.

fake lake love

Traditionally, a lake is defined as “an area of variable size filled with water, localized in a basin, that is surrounded by land,” but these aren’t your grandfather’s lakes. Heck, they’re not even your father’s lakes! These bodies of water are redefining what it means to be a lake. We asked local residents about how they felt about these lakes shedding land and coming together:

“It’s odd we still call these things ‘lakes.’ Many haven’t been lakes for a very long time. It’s like referring to Will Smith as a rapper or Casey Anthony as a human being.”

“We should go the Prince route. For example: we should just call it, ‘The Body of Water Formally Known as Lake Felicity’ or whatever, and change the name to a symbol on all the maps.”

“So these lakes can shred miles of marsh to be together but my boyfriend can’t even take me to eat out on Valentine’s Day? This is infuriating!”

I don’t care how much a lake changes, I think whatever body of water is listed on your map certificate is what you should be called forever.

“Man, why we even gotta name the water?”

 

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3 thoughts on “Heartwarming: While Rest of America Remains Divided, Local Lakes Harmoniously Come Together

  1. I would like to know what genius decided that a lake is “an area of variable size filled with water, localized in a basin, that is surrounded by land.” That is a question; so who said that? If it is a lake now, why wasn’t it a lake before love brought the waters together? What if a lake has an island inside it, is it still a lake or would it be a lake with a blemish? Why isn’t an island called a “lake zit” or an “ocean zit?” This is so confusing! Casey Anthony, yes, I remember her, a blemish on humanity, possibly a “life-form zit?”

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