Thousands of sharks swimming towards Grand Isle for spring break had their vacations ruined this weekend. The frenzy of excited spring breakers swam for hundreds of miles before realizing that Grand Isle was filled with Vibrio Vulnificus (flesh-eating bacteria).

Sharks turn around as they run into the pollution, flesh eating bacteria, and human feces surrounding Grand Isle

This was the last straw for many of these sharks who have been coming here for decades. Add flesh-eating bacteria to pollution, oil spills, overfishing, and habitat loss, and it’s hard for them to justify the long journey.

“Grand Isle just got a little bit safer!” rejoiced Governor and presidential hopeful Bobby Jindal. “By turning Grand Isle into a wave pool of human waste and oilfield detritus, we’ve successfully scared away all of the dangerous predators!”